Just another afternoon with a gloomy mind and some thoughts which never tend to leave with another steaming cup of tea. It’s just kind of awkward how growing up is so glorified and the real essence is often misunderstood. Some take it for freedom, while others feel the suffocation of having a lot of responsibilities piling up making life difficult.
To each its own, but what does it actually mean to grow up? Does it bring a certain kind of loneliness always? I am not sure but I am for sure going through a phase where I feel lonely and lost consistently. At times, it’s liberating because I don’t have to answer anyone about anything and at other times I feel I have absolutely no one to talk to when I have so much inside to share. Isn’t it a trap? To feel so helpless, anxious, saturated and insatiable.
With age, we definitely gain the capability of who is worth our time and energy but that makes us a little distanced from socializing, we tend to go in our own comfort zones, talk to only our limited people, or maybe indulge in some harmless obsessions. And if we don’t find that set of people having time, it gets on to our nerves that why can’t they just talk to us for a while? If you have some people who are in touch, who ask you how your day was, or how is your life going? Do you want to talk about it?, consider yourself blessed. Because going forward in life, people just lessen, your network might grow, you might meet hundreds of new people but you won’t consider it taking it to a personal level because you have defined your space and you won’t let anyone break that wall. It’s strange and maybe understood on some level that we are done with life and we have no energy left to deal with more heartbreaks, more arguments, more explanations and that tends to distance us even more from people and the world.
I don’t know if the above said makes sense to you or what your age is right now, but I just want to tell you one thing, make sure you don’t give up on people who stayed with you when everybody gave up, make some more time from your daily schedule for your loved ones and never let anyone tell you that hope is a denial. Thrive on beliefs and let that energy in your brighten you up every single day because you matter, if not to anybody else then to yourself and a few people who maybe silent but they care. Patience and wait are your strengths, not weaknesses. Keep up at it and let that smile never fade.
Signing off for today. Let me know what you think about this piece 🙂